Tips for Choosing a Mentor

​Having a mentor is the closest thing individuals can have to taking a shortcut in their professional or personal life. Mentors provide support, guidance, and tools that allow them to thrive. Mentors also help individuals avoid mistakes and pitfalls. When picking a mentor, individuals should keep a number of things in mind.

Successful mentorship relationships consist of mentors that mentees admire. They have traveled the path that the mentee also hopes to travel. Ideally, the right mentor stands a few steps ahead of the mentee. Moreover, they have the right expertise and knowledge.

Mentors should also have an eagerness to teach and share insights. Mentorship is about teaching. If a prospective mentor lacks a strong desire to teach, he or she may not be ideal.

Individuals should also consider the values of the prospective mentor. A mismatch in motivation, beliefs, and values may strain the mentorship relationship, especially in the area of ethical concerns.

Mentors must believe in their mentee. They should see the abilities of their mentee in a positive light, which cultivates self-confidence. The best mentor will see beyond the rough edges and doubts. After making a choice, the mentee must believe strongly in the mentor to get the most out of the relationship.

Moreover, mentors should believe in the dreams of their mentees. They should challenge them in their pursuit, but not break them. Sometimes, mentors will hurt the feelings of their mentees. However, honest feedback sometimes hurts, but it should not derail the individual.

Effective mentors provide advice based on their experience, perceptions, and observations. Plus, they provide helpful guidance based on listening sessions with their mentees. Thus, good mentors have solid listening and communication skills.

A lack of listening skills indicates poor communication - the last thing individuals should desire in mentors. Poor communication hurts clarity, causing mentees to struggle to understand their mentor. A good listener isn’t eager to offer advice or pass judgment. They listen more and talk less.

Potential mentors respond to their mentees in a timely fashion. Those who have lapses in their responses may have too many things happening or lack consideration. It can strain the mentorship relationship.

When assessing mentors, look beyond the individual and past their expertise and knowledge. It helps to consider their soft skills, like staff management and leadership. Talking to people who work closely with them will answer questions about who they are as a person. Observing how a prospective mentor handles other people can reveal what to expect from the relationship.

Before deciding on a mentor, individuals should consider specifically what they might want from their mentorship. The information allows individuals to seek and find the best mentor candidates. For example, a mentee looking to network may prioritize a mentor with a vast network of influential participants in their industry.

Sometimes, the right mentor is already in the individual's life. Numerous people have been mentored to success by relatives, friends, and coworkers. Searches within existing networks can be fruitful, and there are also professional mentorship-finding services, like Mogul, LinkedIn, and MentorCity.

Finally, mentors are humans first. They have shortcomings, and they make mistakes. The key is to find a trustworthy mentor who shares the same values and has time to dedicate to the undertaking. In addition, mentorship relationships should benefit both parties. Individuals should respect their mentor and their time, and give back to their mentor to whatever degree possible.

Darrell Crall

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